so wats this im feeling? wats this in dreaming and rolling in my bed thinking?
whos this about? whos this for? why cant i stop? why am i setting myself up for this? playing this slow music so repetitively. why do i do this? this feeling so unshakable. so uncontrollable that ive reached out for help. that ive spilled my heart to strangers. that ive given my thoughts and self..whole self to these unknowns. why am i setting myself up for this. can i handle it?could i handle the change? the dramatics? the love??
the truth?
the wanting and power of want?
could i?
so wat is this that im feeling? that i dream about each night?
i say im grown, mature, im of my right state of mind, if not more then ever.
then why do i feel so lost? why do i feel so uncontrollably lost and confused
this...this thing im calling an emotion has gotten the better of me.
and i have not felt this before.
problem is that its a one-sided feeling staring me in the face. beating me in the head and letting me know that this one-sided feeling is only on my side. lust and want, teasing me in two different scenarios.
playing with my mind and soul telling im valid, just to tell me im wrong.
wat is this feeling?
why am i confused?